Monday, August 08, 2011

I made Fat my friend

I just had this thought: If I was back to my original size... or generally a 'skinny b*tch' (yes, I got that from the book)... my life right now would probably have been considerably more complicated. I realize maybe people really do take comfort and solitude in fat. That people really do protect themselves and hide behind it. You see right... being overweight right now messes horribly with my self esteem... which would immediately make me put myself in the 'one of the boys' category in my own relations w the opposite sex.... and thus never have to deal with the self consciousness and demands of being a 'bess thing' that guys always checking out.

I can easily be good friends with so many guys now, and have relations run so smoothly, because there is no uncomfortable 'checking me out' scene... I am - One of the Guys -

But sooner or later, I will be back to my original size...Hmmm..... but least in the mean while I would have fostered some good friendships with a deeper foundation other than being 'bess'

Ok I gtg now, I left my subway toasting in the oven :)

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